[06] Validation
I fucked up and looked for validation in the best and the worst place: my parents.
For someone who's been living on their own, I'm pretty sure I'm on a good path. I eat my vegetables, can afford to live comfortably, stay hydrated without reminders, and don't pick fights I can't finish. I'm a grown-up, and I don't need to be validated for having parked my thoughts with them...but I kinda sorta want it.
Knowing your parents are on your side as you grow and become an adult is a damn validating feeling. It smoothes out any glaring chips on your shoulders and keeps you from looking for approval in the wrong places (and people). Mine, for example, know and validate very different sides of me, but overall, they both get that I'm a stubbornly diplomatic person at the cost of my mental health. I'll do almost anything to bring them comfort, but over the last few years, I've shed that expectation of myself.
I don't know if that's a good thing for society, but it has been for us. The parents don't see me as an extension of themselves, which means I've been free to be a person. The trouble is, sometimes I don't know how to be one without also being a daughter.